Everything cannot be hopeless

I opened an instagram account. To try again. Last week I got a DM from a guy saying I do not have to lie about my age, I’m certainly not 39!…… My face had the ”uh?” look for about 5 minutes straight! I had my age at the section for bio ”39, …………………bla bla bla” […]

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No Faith

It’s hard to have any faith left when all you’ve prayed and hoped for has not been granted to you. How do you even continue to pray? Who do you have hope or faith in? When the only supreme one you thought would help you is not even listening. Who do you go to for […]

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Thank You

To the few people that bother to read my blog. It means a lot to me. I am not so good with writing and like I pointed out before, the blog is like a therapy page for me. I’ve always needed a place to pour out my thoughts ┬ábecause I do not have friends I […]

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I feel Awful

Prior to the surgery I read a lot about other women have had the same surgery and they all had happy tales of recovery. Either they were all lying or something aint right. I feel very very awful. Sickly, frustrated, depressed, lonely, and in so much pain! I can’t do anything. And it’s much worse […]

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I’m Alive

Thanks for asking.   The Fibroids removal surgery went well. I did feel awful right after it. Thought I was dead. I hated everything and everyone including the nurses and doctors helping me! I just felt sick, weak, tired of life! *Started walking by day 2, though very much like a 200 year old woman. […]

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They say it’s Easter

It’s good friday today. Sunday is supposed to be Easter Sunday. Each day is like every Normal day to me. Birthdays, Christmas, Easter, Muslim holidays….. It makes no difference to me. I’m home watching a movie or Crime Investigation series and eating and wondering when the world will end already. =============================   I don’t like […]

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Another Title

Because I can’t think of a title. Why do we have to put a fucking title? ===========================   Whatever. Went for the Pre-op tests today. Everything that happened and shouldn’t happen as I predicted did. If I had a dollar for every time I get asked if that’s my hair, If thats my nails, If […]

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